Photographic evidence of my existence (and that of Ms. Gofflin and her big pillowy home-made troll doll, Toofus) can be found on Alakazam’s Facebook thingee RIGHT ABOUT HERE.

And thanks again to Holly, Will and Marco at Alakazam for organizing the event! God, that store is just BLEEDING cool… Nicely designed, well-stocked, not a single CHUD hiding in the corners… Honestly, if everyone in the comic industry had the same enthusiasm, creativity and commitment to detail these Alakazamians have, our business would be bigger than Moving Pictures. We need loads more people like that, so please, if you live in the SoCally-type area, show your support! (I hear they might have some extra signed copies of my books, if you’re into that sort of thing…)

And now a small story…

The first time I ever approached someone with the specific intention of obtaining their autograph was when I spotted Siouxsie Sioux at O’Hare Airport in Chicago eight years ago. We were both waiting for the same flight to San Francisco, and we had a LONG time to wait, so I had PLENTY of time to sit and squirm and just generally work my stomach into thick, twitchy emotional knots over whether or not approaching her would be “the thing to do.”

As we were about to board the plane, I sprang into action:

“Excuse me, I’m, uh… I’m a big fan of, uh, yours… Would you, uh… would you mind, uh, signing… uh, something… for me?” (12 additional “uh’s” removed for clarity.)

“Well I don’t know. What do you have for me?”

NOW. One way of interpreting this question -the normal, not-insane-person kind of way- is that she’s asking me for some specific object upon which to write her name. A sheet of paper, say. Or a Compact Disc. Perhaps even a boob.

I, however, chose to interpret the question as a request for a trade: “I will give you my autograph, strange twitchy kid who’s been gawking at me for the past hour while I discussed Coen Brothers movies with my fellow Banshees, provided you have something of equivalent value for ME.”

I glanced down at my clipboard (the VERY ONE YOU SAW YESTERDAY, assuming you were at the Alakazam signing, which you were because you’re awesome-sauce).

“I um… I could give you this, um, lovely… drawing here.”

She took the clipboard from me and did her swirly little name thing right under the top-most drawing.

“THANK YOU!” I said (probably). She smiled and turned to get back in line.

“THE TRADE, YOU FOOL!” my brain shrieked at me, in the style of Ralphie from A Christmas Story. “YOU’VE FORGOTTEN THE TRADE!”

Thinking fast, I unclipped the drawing -the very one she had JUST SIGNED- and tried to hand it to her. “I was serious, you know! You, uh, you can seriously have this drawing!”

She didn’t even look confused. She just smiled again, said “Not with my name on it,” and strolled onto the plane. I got on a few minutes later and tried not to make eye contact as I looked for my seat.

NO, THIS STORY DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE.

But it does explain why I have, on my wall right at this moment, a framed printout of Mary Ann Mirolette signed by Siouxsie Sioux:

Why did I tell that story? Well, if you are a fan of Serenity Rose or my stuff in general, there is a greater than 50% chance that you are sort of introverted. You’re a shy person, like me. Not the type to go up and talk to one of your favorite artists at a book signing or a comic convention or, y’know, just out on the street. Maybe you’d really LIKE to do that kind of thing from time to time, but you just feel too… I don’t know, intimidated or whatever.

But you shouldn’t feel that way.

I’m the guy who tried to pay Siouxsie Sioux for her autograph… WITH HER OWN AUTOGRAPH.

And I’m not the only artist with a story like that, either.

I’ll see you at the next signing!

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Will Sera get pulled out of a hat, BUNNYSTYLE?

IT COULD HAPPEN!

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To celebrate, what do you say we get down and do a good old-fashioned BOOK SIGNING, comic-style.

The kindly prestidigitators at ALAKAZAM COMICS in Irvine, CA have invited me to come sully the reputation of their fine establishment this SATURDAY, JANUARY 30th, from 4-6 PM. I’ll be chatting with fans, doing sketches, selling original pages, and pulling rabbit after rabbit out of my wee little tophat until we all suffocate under 60,000 lbs. of luxurious angora fur. (Or until 6 PM, whichever comes first.)

Irvine is about an hour down the coast from Los Angeles, so hopefully a lot of you Southern California types will be able to make it. Check out the Alakazam site for more specific directions and so forth.

I think the last time I did a book signing outside of the San Diego Comic-Con was… never? Was it never? Might’ve been never. Wait… No, I did a couple of Alternative Press Expos a long, loooong, lllllooooooooonnnnngg time ago. ENORMOUS THANKS to Holly at Alakazam for her concerted efforts to get me out of my house and down to Irvine over the past few years. (And if anyone else out there happens to own/manage a comic book store in a (especially in the NON Southern California-ish parts of the country) and wants to set up a similar event, it could very well be possible.)

See you in Irvine!

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UPDATE 1/27: The book is in comic shops (and AMAZON) NOW! Hopefully!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, everyone!

I’ve returned from nearly three weeks of self-imposed internet exile and have begun the slow, laborious climb-back to the land of productivity. Which means, among other things, promoting this new full-color book-shaped doo-hickey I have coming out later this month. To everyone who did the whole Christmas pre-order thing, BIG THANKS… I should have those for you in a couple of weeks (keep your eyes peeled for e-mailings).

For everyone else, it looks like my publisher, SLG, has them available through their webstore RIGHT NOW, and AMAZON should have them, at their standard massive Amazon discount rate, very soon (Oh man, how cool would it be if you WROTE A REVIEW?). Your local comic shoppy-type places ought to have the books in stock by the end of the month… I’ll keep you updated.

SERENITY ROSE VOL. 2: GOODBYE, CRESTFALLEN!
	A BUBBLING HORDE OF SERA’S WORST NIGHTMARES COME CLAWING AT YOUR FACE – IN FULL(ish) COLOR! FROM SLG PUBLISHING.
	ALL THIS AND MORE:
BUY IT FROM AMAZON – $19.95
- SLG – POWELL’S – BARNES & NOBLE -

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Would you believe me if I told you that Snowman right there is the very first Invader Zim-related art commission I’ve ever done? IT IS TRUE.

For additional curiosities, including a sketch of something called a “Jacob’s Ladderlope,” kindly consult the COMMISSIONS GALLERY.

And, as always, if you’d like to request your OWN crime against nature, please send all of your plaintive howls for acceptance to SERENITY@HEARTSHAPEDSKULL.COM. The base price for art commissions is $50, and $30 for each additional character on the same page. Shipping is all kinds of free within the U.S., and a mere $3 to parts beyond.

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I’m sorry, Corpse Kid. I wanted Goodbye, Crestfallen! to be out in time for Christmas, too, but it’s just not going to happen. In fact, it turns out the book won’t even be out on the shelves until late January. Ish.

So no new Serenity Rose book for Christmas this year.

What’s that, Corpse Kid? You want to know what went wrong? Well, it’s complicated… It’s a COLOR book this time, y’see, and a color book means working with a new printer in China, and working with a printer in China means shipping via boat across the Pacific, and shipping via boat across the- Yeah, you’re already glazing over a bit there, aren’t you? It’s okay, I don’t really get it, either. It’s just COMPLICATED, right?

What I DO know, however, from this ADVANCE COPY sitting right here in front of me right now, is that the final book will be ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. SLG has done a tremendous job in putting this one together, and I honestly couldn’t be happier. The colors are stunning, the tones are perfect, all the detail is crystal clear, and the binding -because I know you’ve been wondering- appears STURDY ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND THE FURY OF A LUMBERJACK. (Provided said lumberjack expresses his fury by re-reading comic book compilations, in a normal manner, every few weeks for a reasonable number of years.)

The thing is NICE, Corpse Kid. Very much worth the extra wait. (Now please call off the Halloween Town invasion of China. The Ghost Festival does not need any “gothing up” today, thank you.)

For the rest of you guys…

I’m really sorry about the delay… I know a lot of you were hoping to give someone the book as a gift this year, so this really sucks. One day I will have my own personal armada of ocean-going comic-delivery warships, but, sadly, that day has not yet arrived.

But I CAN offer you this tiny thing:

SEND ME AN E-MAIL, and I’ll put your name on the list to get a SIGNED copy of SR Vol. 2 as soon as they arrive here in the U.S…. And I’ll even include a little goblin sketch with every book. The price will be $19.95 (cover price), plus shipping… but we won’t worry about that until the books are actually here. (And yeah, all you guys outside the U.S. are eligible.)

After you’ve contacted me, I’ll send you a link to a higher-res version of the image above (300 dpi TIF file, 5 x 7.66″) so that you can print it out and, y’know, put it in a card, tuck it in with another gift, whatever you need.

Does that sound okay? I know it’s not quite the same thing as a real, live book, but it’s SOME thing, right? And like I was telling the Corpse Kid up there… all this extra hassle for color printing will most DEFINITELY be worth it come January. (Trust me.)

“See how I transform this old rat inTO a most deLIGHTful hat!”

SERENITY@HEARTSHAPEDSKULL.COM

Happy Holidays!

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BUT ANY-WHO. I have FOUR new pages from Serenity Rose Volume 2: Goodbye, Crestfallen uploaded to the eBayosphere right now, just in time for our current holiday season of gift-giving obligations. This will be the last auction before the book release next month… I figured you die-hard secret internet clubhouse folks deserved one more chance to grab a page or two before the larger comic book world is reminded of my existence in December.

HERE ARE THE THINGS (clicks and such for the listing):

Thank you in advance for the biddery! I’m not quite sure when the next set will go up for auction, but I suspect it won’t take another EIGHT MONTHS. And, of course, let me know if there’s a page you’re particularly interested in… I’ll try to include it in the next batch.

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Why yes, that IS Sonic the Hedgehog’s pal Tails menacing a Warhammer 40K Space Marine with a “chainsaw sword” while Frank Zappa saunters by in the background with a disapproving look on his face. What of it?

Bunches more, including one (1) image of two (2) David Byrnes, in the COMMISSIONS GALLERY. That place is getting to be the coolest gallery on my site, actually… If only my whole professional life could be nothing but Serenity Rose and peculiar commissions.

If you’d like to request your OWN rendering of Frank Zappa (or anything else) send your demands to SERENITY@HEARTSHAPEDSKULL.COM. The base price is $50, and $30 for each additional character on the same page. Shipping is all kinds of free within the U.S., and a mere $3 to parts beyond.

I probably won’t be able to dig into any new commissions until around December 1st, so this is pretty much THE call for CHRISTMAS REQUESTS right here… And I already have a few folks in the queue, so if you were hoping for a sketch of mine to wad up in somebody’s stocking this year, NOW IS YOUR TIME!

HERE ARE SUPERHEROES:

One of these guys is called “Wiccan.” Not to be confused with Brendan “BAD ASS” Li’s immortal character of the same name. (COMIX: Not just for kids anymore!)

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Some years ago, on a suffocating August night here in Ol’ Virginny, my good friend Jhonen V. and I, having recently eaten our fill of filthy meat and raw terbacky, retired to the porch of my crumbling Antebellum mansion to watch mosquitoes drain our blood and reminisce about the old times. Between puffs on our corn-cob pipes we spoke of many things, but, as was our custom, the conversation soon turned to our mutual friend Rikki S., and his terrible ways with Ham.

HERE IS THAT CONVERSATION IN FULL.

Soon after that fateful night, Jhonen began to fill a FLICKR SET with etchings of the Unspeakable Thing, as if by forcing strangers to render the hateful image again and again he could somehow exorcize it from his agonized mind. (As to his ultimate success or failure I cannot say, as the coroner’s document remains painfully elusive on all matters immaterial.) I, for my part, returned to the darkest corner of my decaying ancestral home and crouched there in the stultifying shadows, swaying and staring, staring, EVER STARING, and thinking only of the Hams and the Furnace and the hateful Thing that would one day bring both of them to me.

I crouched there for 2 years, 10 months, 3 days and 13 hours… then someone commissioned me to do this drawing for fifty bucks.

“WHATEVER,” I said.

And then Rikki colored it, it being HIS Ham Chamber and all. I think we can all agree it’s pretty hideous and disturbing and you wouldn’t want to be stuck sitting next to it on a bus or anything, but man… Not sure it was worth dying in a madhouse over or anything. But ha! I guess that’s just how it goes sometimes.

Crazy stuff, man!

Get your own HAM DEMON PRINT, signed by me and the Mr. Ham Demon himself, Rikki Simons, right about here:

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FIRST OF ALL…

BIG THANK YOU to everyone who’s been following GOODBYE CRESTFALLEN week after week for the past 600 years. (It’s been 600 years, right? Seems like 600.) I really do appreciate you guys coming here week after week, month after month, decade after decade, supporting the comic and making me feel like I’m not just screaming, feebly, into a hideously empty void. You have rendered me VOID-LESS, and I am enjoying it quite a lot indeed!

I especially appreciate all you comment-leaving types out there (and not just for the free spell-checking you provide). All the guessing and theorizing and whatnot is just BRILLIANT… I think some of you (Alphatroll) have given more thought to how the witching world works than *I* have. (Was that MATH in there??)

(You are strongly encouraged to continue speculating wildly in the official-type Serenity Rose forum, Bubblegum Noir.)

SO.

I guess the question is…

WHEN IS VOLUME 3?

SOON.

Well… hopefully soon, anyway. My policy is that I won’t start Serenity’s next story until I’m ABSOLUTELY 100% NO-SCREWING-AROUND-HERE POSITIVE I can tear through all 120-some-odd pages, two per week, until it’s done. It takes a long, long, veryvery long time to render out these Serenity Rose pages, unfortunately, and it’s very hard to balance that time with the time spent, y’know, “making a living.”

The demon Botched Deadline claws hungrily at my mindmeats, and his hateful little imp, Irregular Update, taunts me every night in my dreams.

A Serenity Rose book costs roundabout $8000 to make, believe it or not, so if I’m going to make another one, I need to pile up some money for a while… There are a couple of long(ish)-term freelance projects hovering over my head right now maybe possibly, so that’s good, but YOU TOO can help support the Serenity Rose Vol. 3 Completion Fund…

HERE IS HOW:

1) Pre-Order THE BOOK! And help spread the words!

2) Pick out some ORIGINAL ART!

3) Grab a PRINT!

4) Request a SKETCH COMMISSION!

5) DIRECT DONATIONS! I’m just like NPR.

With luck I’ll have the proper SR funds raised and a nice clear desk within a year. But… of course, if any of you happen to have $8000 lying around RIGHT NOW, I could get Volume 3 rolling by January 1st. Check your sock drawers, folks!

(NOTE: Heartshapedskull.com will NOT (repeat: NOT) be lying fallow during these dark, lonely days of money-grubbing Seralessness. Nope, I definitely have some thinks in mind, and maybe if you come back in a week or two, you’ll see what I mean.)

And thank you again for reading and supporting Serenity’s little story over the years. I am literally bursting my guts to show you what happens next.

BOOK 3 (and 4) AWAIT.

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